The Beauty of Life

My beloved dog, Staci passed away gently in the night on Valentine’s Day. I lay with her while she transitioned stroking her fur and murmuring how much I love her. I reminisced about all the fond memories we shared in the past 14 years. She was my companion when I did not have anyone else to depend on. Staci was by my side while raising my son. I cannot express the feelings her life and death have invoked in me. Well, I guess I will try to express it as best as I can.

I found out she had a mass cell tumor nine months ago. The vet said she didn’t have very long to live. He said we’ll do what we can for and however long you have with her is a gift from God. I used as many remedies as I could both conventional and holistic. She flourished under my love and care. The symptoms she had of approaching death diminished and we were given the gift of time.

The feelings I experienced were intensified; both the highs and lows were all the more sweet and bitter. Each walk we took both long and short were treasured. I noticed the beauty of nature all around me all the more profoundly. I felt the air in my lungs and my heart as it beat. The breeze on my face was as welcome as the sunshine beating on my shoulders. Our moonlit walks gave me the opportunity to commune with the Universe. I shared my secrets, fears, hopes and dreams. Each breath taken by both her and me was revered. Through Staci I was taught to see the beauty in life.

My emotions have been raw during the past year, both the pain and joy all the more intense. When I realized I had only a certain period of time with my best friend I was saddened at all the times I ignored her. The times I was too preoccupied with other things to enjoy a long walk, a day at the park, or a car ride while listening to some good music. I took the time to stop spreading myself with too many things and just do the simple things I love to do. All the rest simply fell by the wayside.

My intent for a long time had been to stop the chatter in my head, the endless worrying and slow down my fast paced life. Given the opportunity to spend time with my family and pets was the perfect excuse. When I stopped stressing about money, the money came. I have learned to take the time to value my loved ones and let them know how much I care. Things have a way of working out. In the end all you remember is the love you shared.

My heart is so full. My love is endless and bountiful. I love with no abandon and I am never too proud to tell someone I love you, I’m there for you, and I care. Time is so precious and it goes so fast. In an instant the moment is gone. If we don’t cherish each moment it is not returned to us.

My fondest memories are etched in my brain. I can recall all the precious moments shared with those I care for as if they were a ballad I had composed or a piece of art created in my heart. No amount of anxiety over bills or work or responsibilities, will interfere with the expression of life in motion. For when we look back we are reminded how everything always worked out. It always has, it always will. The moments we treasure are the ones that are engraved in our being.

Staci was strong up until the end. She continued to give us unconditional love and loyalty. I saw she was slowing down. I didn’t want to be selfish anymore. I looked deeply into her eyes and told her it was okay for her to go. I was letting go and surrendering control, thus allowing her to decide when she was ready. I reassured her that I was okay. That I could take care of myself, that I had friends and family that loved me. My son, Travis, who she watched grow up, will be graduating from high school shortly. I assured her we would be okay; she didn’t need to worry about us anymore.

I told her I wanted her to go at home where she would be comfortable. I explained that I wouldn’t be scared. I wanted her to have ease and grace in her transition that which she so deserved. The day she went she walked slowly but didn’t appear ill. I gave her a pain pill and she went under the bed. I took a pillow and spent the afternoon nestled beside her.

She lay in my arms and all I could think of was the endless pleasure we shared together. My heart filled with love and affection. She went on Valentine’s Day, the day of love. Her gift to me was to remind me that only love is real. I realized even though my beloved companion was gone she will always live in my heart.

From this day forward life will always be sacred to me. I will never again take it for granted. I am in awe of the beauty around me. The beauty in nature, the miracles of the world, but most importantly, the beauty found in loving others. The intense beauty revealed in receiving, giving, and knowing true love. That is the true secret of the Universe, which is imprinted within each and every heart.

Prayer

Dear God,

Each moment is a blessing. I feel the precious gift of life as I honor each moment, each day, each breath, and each person. May I never forget the sanctity and beauty given to me during this experience of life.

I slow down and see through new eyes, an open heart, and a clear mind.

I love.

And so it is.

Amen.

Comments

kay 19th February 2010 9:42 am

Thank you, Staci and Stephanie, for the love you've allowed and generated.

tdeibel@ontera.net 19th February 2010 10:23 am

My heart goes out to you Stefanie. Our pets are so unconditional with us-thank you for the reminder to stay present with mine. Four years ago I too had to give my permission to my bleoved Labrador who had epilepsy. I felt he was hanging on for my sake- the medications was not controlling the seizures anymore so I too let him know I would be Okay if he went home. To my shock- he died that afternoon. A year later he came to me in a reading with someone who could see him- she said he was bouncy and excited to see me and wanted to express his thanks to me for letting him go. He wanted me to know he had made it home. I was so comforted by this encounter and in awe that our pets really do want/need our permission to leave.They want to know we will be Okay. Thank you for sharing your pain and awarenss.

kiredale 19th February 2010 11:54 am

Stephanie, thank you for sharing this beautiful love story with us. It's a wonderful reminder to all of us of how important love is and of how our animal friends are able to open our hearts to this love.

Blessings to both you and Staci as I'm sure she's still close by and looking after you.

aiyana_rosel 19th February 2010 3:51 pm

Thankyou for sharing this with us :) It was so beautifully written and personal I found it really touching. I understand what you feel about death making you appreciate life more, it causes you to take every day as a gift rather than coasting by not achieving what you want to in life.
I'm sorry for your loss but it's so refreshing to see you focusing on the fond memories :)
Lots of love xyx

k 19th February 2010 5:54 pm

Stephanie, when I lost my Gandalf suddenly a few months ago to gastric torsion, the administrator of the spiritlibrary, deleted my messages and sent me a private email telling me essentially I needed therapy for my emoptional problem. Looking at this positivily I guess I will call that experience a lesson in tough love or really the lack there of.

Val1311 19th February 2010 6:37 pm

My beloved golden retriever, Jenny, also transitioned on Valentine's Day. She was my dad's companion and the light of our lives, the sweetest, happiest, most loving dog. We are still trying to make sense of it, to find something good in it, to accept it and move on (not very successfully, I must add). The pain is just too great.
Thank you for your wise words, you are so right!

Mariù 19th February 2010 6:49 pm

To K:

As we said back then, we deleted your comments because they were too many and not related to the channeling you were posting the comments under. We sent you a private email to say that we were sorry but we needed to remove those comments, inviting you to open a forum thread instead to share your experience. We never expressed any judgement on you or on what you were going through.

k 20th February 2010 12:09 am

At the time it was a very painful experience, but out of it I gained a greater understanding of how the universe works. It has been my perception, that is not accurate, that allows the experience to be painful or any feeling of rejection to remain. In this experience I had to try to see beyond the painful illusion and learn the lesson, so you were only playing out your role. Your motives and what you hold in your heart is your business, correcting my perception is my responsibility.

Mariù 20th February 2010 7:27 am

I'm really sorry if that was a painful experience for you and it was never our intention to reject you. Please know that you are very welcome here! Our only intent was to invite you to share your experience in the forum where it could be seen and others could come and join you. It's definitely not the easiest or the most pleasant role for us but we do have to stick to some guidelines to make sure that the website keeps giving a nice experience to everyone.

I'm so glad that Stefanie's article is giving us the opportunity to talk and share about this again as I didn't feel good about it either at the time and funny enough when you replied to our email I felt so rejected too, considering that I put into SL all my heart and hard work. Thank You for the opportunity to grow and understand. 

Mariu

Bright Sorcerer 20th February 2010 3:39 pm

Beautifully explained and I could not stop the tears that sprinkled my cheeks. I will definitely be sharing this reminder of the sacredness of life and love with my listeners today. Blessings, Nick

k 21st February 2010 8:17 pm

Mariu, this off topic...:), but I want you to know you provide a great service. Your website has been a source of inpiration and guidance over the past year. You are very much appreciated.

dhana 3rd March 2010 3:23 am

I have also lost my dog, she passed away last month. I miss her, I remember her sweet ways when I go home she'd immediately come near me she enjoys it when ever I cuddle her. I was sad at the first few weeks but that was a challenge for me to really let go, payday loans but I remained calm the whole time, just thinking every thing happens for a reason.

Advertisement

Keep updated with Spirit Library

Author Information

Stefanie Miller - A Magical World

Stefanie Miller is a teacher, energy healer, spiritual counselor and an intuitive, channeled writer. She holds a Bachelor's degree in Education and has taught elementary school for over 16 years. Stefanie has been assisting individuals on their spiritual path since 1998.  Facilitating private healing sessions, workshops and through her channeled writing, Stefanie guides individuals toward achieving self mastery by connecting with their Higher Self and Source through a heart centered focus.

Advertisement

Stefanie Miller - A Magical World Archives