Who Heals the Healer?

“I am here to heal you.” he said from somewhere in the dark.

I thought I was doing fine.  I thought I was going to have to heal him.

I squinted my eyes in the dark to see more clearly the fellow at my feet.  His bulging eyes looked up at me.  As his body did not move my concern for him grew.

After accidentally kicking this little frog on my night time walk, I had stopped to make sure he was okay.  He had practically jumped at me, running right into my foot.

As I knelt  beside him I hoped he would hop away from me.  Then I would be reassured all was well.  But instead of hopping away in fear, he remained completely still.

As I moved my hand over him, he still did not hop away.

Reluctant to actually touch him, I tenderly stroked his back with a leaf.  And still, he did not move.  In fact he seemed to relax more.

Now I felt myself wanting to touch him.  Very slowly I moved my hand towards him.  He watched but remained still.

My fingers touched his back, and he sat like one of my clients on a massage table – open and relaxed.

I stroked his back.

He did not budge.

Now I was convinced there must be something wrong with him.  Why wasn’t he hopping away?  Did I break his legs?  Did I stun him?

I began to send healing energy through my fingers to him, hoping to save him.

Instead he responded by saying, “I am here to heal you.

Instantly I was transported back to a moment just a few weeks previously when I was comforting friends of Jen Lee.

When my friend and long time devoted student, Jen Lee, passed over this past year, I was invited to her Celebration of Life.  It was held on beautiful Fox Island on Puget Sound this past December.

At the ceremony I stood in front of Jen’s very large family, extended family, her own students and friends, and spoke of Jen’s gifts, her beauty, and her bright light.   I met Jen at an Expo in Portland nine years ago.  When I first met her she appeared to be a Goddess to me.  Her light was so bright, her wisdom so deep, I was stunned when she asked me to be her teacher.

After the ceremony  I was offering love and support to some of Jen’s closest friends.  I felt Jen’s love for them flowing through me, and I did my best to hug and hold everyone.  I wanted them to feel Jen, to know how much she loves them still.  I did my best to help them understand how close she is to all of them, still.

As one of Jen’s dear friends let me hold her in an embrace one more time, she tenderly whispered in my ear, “Who heals the healer, Cat?”

We held each other and I looked into her eyes.  I saw her compassion and concern for me.  And I thought of the ways I seek healing.

“I will get to the ocean when I return to Florida,” I assured her, and myself, “Nature heals me.”

She continued to hold my gaze.  Her eyes were teary, but my eyes refused to yield to the tears.  I was there to help others.  It was not my time to cry.

She continued to look at me, and I felt a deep wisdom rise up to my lips, “God heals.”

We nodded and silently let each other go.  She left with her husband’s arms around her and I turned away thinking of the many ways God heals.

For my dear friends Megan and Jen, in 2013 they received the ultimate healing and they are now reborn.  Our friends and relations who leave us and go on to the Spirit World, they are healed.

Those of us who feel left behind, must heal.  We must go on without their physical presence.  We must learn new ways of being in relationship.  My relationships with Jen and Megan have not ended, they have merely changed form.

Because of Jen and Megan, my gifts continue to grow stronger.  I feel them, see them and am receiving their love and guidance.  Everyday I am more appreciative of my gifts to connect with those I love beyond the confines of email, phone and all physical means of communication.  Love transcends all limitations.  I can feel their love, just as I can feel and appreciate love long distance, I can feel love from beyond this world.

But being in a physical form means we still need physical healing again and again.  We are in physical form and we need physical touch, too.

And so there in the dark I sat down beside Him.  I looked up at the stars and around me at the boggy pond, and then I gazed in wonder at my Frog friend, the ultimate healer.

As I sat softly touching him, I wondered why I had always been so afraid to touch him.  His skin was soft and his stillness reassured me.  He was gentle and sweet and kind, and he was looking at me.

I took a deep breath and opened myself up to receive whatever I needed.

And He healed me.

Energy flowed through me and over me and around me.  As I opened to His power, I sensed the presence of other spiritual beings.  I knew he was not working alone, yet it was my willingness to reach out and touch him, that opened me up to receive.

I sat on the dark path by the pond, fingers delicately touching his back until he told me what to do next.  In the silence I realized I was the one who needed help.

“Now go home and crawl in bed.” The Healer said.

I did as he directed.  As soon as my head hit the pillow visions came.  And healing rushed through every part of me.

By morning I felt reborn.

In a tender moment when I was in need, my hand reached out to touch Him, and He offered His healing to me.

God heals.

God is everywhere, in everything and everyone.

Stop and let God heal you.

He will show up for you.  Sometimes in dark, unexpected places.  But He is always there, always knowing just what we need to heal.

Reach out.  Touch a frog.  Hug a tree.  Sit by the sea.  Surrender.

God Heals.

In Light and Even In the Dark – with Love,