Being Judgemental

Question: I have been told that I am a judgmental person and I agree with that. Since becoming aware I have been working on that and my ego everyday. What are your thoughts on being judgmental and is it really possible to not judge anyone or any decision ever? Thank you.

Answer: You are not a judgmental person. Your mind does what it has been conditioned to do, that's all. The most important thing is that you are already aware of what your mind is doing. A truly judgmental person is someone who doesn't know he/she is judgmental. They are so identified with their mind that they completely believe in every thought (judgment) that comes into their head.

Awareness is the key. Most judgmental thoughts are of a negative kind, of course. So notice as much as you can your negative thoughts (about other people, individuals or groups, yourself, a place, a situation you find yourself in, something that is happening but "shouldn't" etc.) Notice the mind's tendency to find fault with people and situations, to complain, to pronounce righteous judgment.

Gradually, the dimension of awareness will grow and those mental habits will weaken. Negativity is a dreadful burden to live with. It tends to be reflected back to you through negative situations and people and prevents your life from unfolding with ease. But don't try to suppress your judgments. Have compassion with your mind.

A judgment is harmless if you immediately recognize it as such and don't completely believe in it anymore. Then, gradually, awareness dissolves the judgmental mind.

Yes, it is possible to live without judgment. Becoming friendly with the present moment is the key.

There are two books you may find helpful. One is A Thousand Names for Joy by Byron Katie. This book gives you a sense of what it is like on a daily basis to live without judgment. The other book is called The Voice of Knowledge by Don Miguel Ruiz.







k 12th December 2008 9:37 am

Looking at my fellow humans as children each of us following our own path and on various levels of development helps me. Trying to keep compassion in my heart and remember that I do not always know the total situation the other person may be dealing with. At the same time if I feel someone is way out of line, I try to ask God to direct me on the best way to approach them in a loving way to guide them toward the light. God has tough love for us and as we work toward creating a better world I think we each have a resposiblity to expect our fellow humans to have proper conduct.


Keep updated with Spirit Library

Author Information

Eckhart Tolle

Spiritual Teacher and author was born in Germany and educated at the Universities of London and Cambridge. At the age of twenty-nine a profound inner transformation radically changed the course of his life. The next few years were devoted to understanding, integrating and deepening that transformation, which marked the beginning of an intense inward journey.

Books from Eckhart Tolle

Oneness With All Life Cover image
Eckhart Tolle
A New Earth Cover image
Eckhart Tolle
The Power of Now Cover image
Eckhart Tolle


Eckhart Tolle Archives