Unlucky in Love? Broken Contracts & Star-Crossed Soul Mates

Hello friends. Well it’s Valentine’s week and lots of folks have love on their mind. Happy in love, no love, brokenhearted, bitter, or just plain angry. Almost everyone’s got a story to tell, and I certainly am no exception. Despite the title, I assure you this isn’t a gloomy blog post and we’re going to cover some interesting ground here.

In my work over the years with the Edgar Cayce material and my own work in the Akashic Records, I’ve seen many interesting and compelling things, in the relationship area especially. According to Cayce and many other spiritual teachers, relationship is one of the “fast tracks” on the spiritual curriculum of self-knowledge and awareness; due to the powerful mirrors that they provide for us as a clue to our own deep motivations and unhealed places. They are also a powerful arena for higher consciousness, expansion and joy too.

Same story. New Edition

Have you ever wondered why the *same* person keeps showing up with a different name and a different face, but with the SAME message? The Universe in its infinite wisdom will often repeat lessons, and players in our individual karmic drama until we master what we have agreed to learn. One of the beautiful things about Akashic/Soul level work is that you can truly see how compassionate and wise that Source/Spirit is, and also that we are when in our expanded, Higher Self level.

Well I’m here looking through an old picture frame, just waiting for the perfect view. I hope something special will step into my life, another fine edition of you. A pin-up in shades of blue. – Bryan Ferry - Editions of you – Roxy Music

In some cases, it actually MAY be the same person (that is if that suits your particular beliefs and/or experience.) Here’s the link to my blog post on Soul Recognition from 2011.

Contract Breakers & Renegotiations

I have seen many cases both in my own life and in the life of my clients where there was something that was spiritually contracted to happen between two people, but for certain reasons this did NOT occur. The Keepers offered some guidance on this subject back in 2011:

Beloveds, with so much emphasis on relationship lately in your Grand Cross energies (2010-2015,) there have been more questions on Soul Contracts between people. We spoke in the past of when you feel that your contract to others has been fulfilled; but the question has been presented, “What if someone has a contract with you and they are the ones that walk away from it? How do you know if you have a contract in the first place?”

First of all we prefer to use the word “agreement” as it has a less binding tone to it. Yes an agreement IS a form of a contract, but due to free will and other factors, you are always free to make changes to the agreement. Those that carry soul agreement with each other will often feel a deep and resounding soul attraction, which does not always have to manifest on a romantic level. Soul agreements besides love/life partners can also manifest in teacher-student, familial, co-worker, or guru-disciple relationships as well.

There is a tendency for the people to use your term, “bite off more than they can chew,” karmically and cosmically; in the sense that often the inertia of 3D life on the planet can overtake them. It certainly does take faith, courage and resolve to fulfill one’s obligations spiritual and otherwise, and not everyone is always up to the task, especially if they are dealing with what is called “Soul Fatigue.” Which is a fatigue at a spiritual or soul level, that can be temporarily debilitating.

For the one that has turned away from their agreement with another may find themselves feeling confusion and in some cases a deep guilt. Some may choose to numb or medicate these feelings away with drugs and/or alcohol, for deep down they know that there is something amiss. The remedy for this predicament is for the individual to admit and accept that they have changed the course of their life’s path; and to do this consciously. If they are able to make amends to the other party involved, this will help ease the sting of the situation.

For the one that is holding up their end of the contract to so speak, there is also often confusion and misunderstanding regarding the other person. There also can be a form of spiritual co-dependency as this person “hangs in there,” and waits for the other person to “come around.” To allow someone time to fulfill their agreement is loving and generous, but to invest an undue amount of time in a relationship that is not going to flourish is another. If you feel that you are in a relationship with someone that is unwilling and/or unable to fulfill their agreement with you, bless and release them. It is important that you leave the relationship as neutral and calm as possible. There are times where you will be able to meet again, if that is mutually amenable. If it is not, let go with love. There is a saying,”There are times when you must remove someone from of your life, but never kick them out of your heart,” and this is well said.

In these times of discernment, you are invited to check up and search your heart if you find yourselves in a scenario like this. If you require further guidance, a trained spiritual counselor with experience in soul agreements may be helpful. – The Keepers, 9.22.11

If you find yourself in the middle of a drama with a reluctant soul mate type, have heart. I’ve got a little something I like to call the “Triple Yes.”

1) Can people change? YES. Most definitely.

2) Do miracles and Shifts occur? YES. Every day.

3) Until you “seal the deal” should you keep your options open? YES!

It’s also good to remember that you really do HAVE TIME. Egoic/ordinary mind loves to trick us that now is all that we’ve got. In once sense it’s true, but it’s also not good to think that our story with another human being has to be resolved and tied off in a neat little bow immediately. Sometimes, that is just not going to happen. At least not on “our” time. There comes a point with a star-crossed lover or friend that you simply must accept things for how they are, even if they aren’t exactly what you wanted. You can’t push the river as the old saying goes, and you can’t make someone love you or be ready for relationship when they are not. That’s just a fact, though I never seem to get a lot of fans for saying it.

I sit here on the stairs, ’cause I’d rather be alone. If I can’t have you right now, I’ll wait dear. Sometimes I get so tense but I can’t speed up the time, but you know love there’s one more thing to consider. Said woman take it slow and it’ll work itself out fine, you and I’ll just use a little patience. Said sugar take the time cause the lights are shining bright, you and I’ve got what it takes to make it. We won’t fake it and I’ll never break it. – Izzy Stradlin, “Patience” by Guns & Roses

Looking for love in all the wrong places?

I know you’ve probably heard it many times before, so I will keep this part short. Ronna Herman sums it up very succinctly with her quote below. Looking for anyone to “complete us,” is a slippery slope, and for obvious reasons. To connect with another human being from our joy, and wholeness (holiness,) is a very different experience than leading with our wounds. Dysfunctional relationships DO have their place however, as we can learn just as efficiently from what NOT to do, than from what to do. It’s important to remember that no matter how it feels, we are NOT being punished by the Universe or any higher power. To quote the brilliant Alan Watts, “When you get the message, you can hang up the phone.” What can I say? I know for myself I had to answer a lot of wrong numbers along the way.

Love as an external focus, exterior to you, will always bring a sense of vulnerability, always needing constant validation by someone or something. Love as an internal focus projected outward is a constant flow of self-assurance, of self-acceptance, always striving to incorporate and project more of this blissful feeling of unity and harmony with all creation. – Ronna Herman

In the end, it boils down to one thing: self-love. That’s really what its all about anyway, as unromantic as that sounds. When we are centered in our own truth and joy and magnetize partners in from THAT place, it’s a whole new ball game. I can tell you from personal experience, it’s worth the wait. ? ?

Happy Valentine’s Day. Love & blessings all.