Contradictory Wholeness
As we edge ever closer to the powerful cosmic alignments of 26th August, the heavens encourage us to prepare by exploring evermore deeply the existence of opposites within our psyche. To embrace those bits of ourselves which seem opposed whilst also occupying the same space. Here we often find less attractive qualities we want to hide from the outside world.
We like to own one end of the spectrum but not the other. We consider ourselves patient so we ignore the part which gets really irritated. We see ourselves as compassionate so we ignore the bit which wants to judge and condemn. We want to support those who are being tyrannised by others, so we ignore our own inner tyrant which rears its ugly head from time to time. We see ourselves as a failure so conveniently ignore our successes. Yes, it works in both directions!
It’s very human to be this way. Everyone does it. Few of us are entirely comfortable with the paradoxical opposites from which we are constructed. Life would be so much simpler if we could just be one way, the way we want to be, and the other bits would just shrivel up and drop off! But they won’t, no matter how much we avoid, deny and ignore them. In fact, the more we do that the stronger they become in their fight to be acknowledged and heard. So what to do?
Well, the advice from the heavens right now is to give up the fight, stop trying to be what we’re not (uni-dimensional) and start being what we are (a great big mass of fascinating contradictions, paradoxical opposites and irrational thoughts and feelings!). Because, and this is the nub of it all, that’s exactly what we’re supposed to be. That’s what being human is!
We embody all these powerful energies and forces, we exist amid multifarious influences coming at us from all directions, and from all of this we emerge into being with the task of living out our unique individuality born of this complex energy field in which we live and breathe. We were never meant to be straightforward. We’re here to live amidst complexity and still find a way to do so with integrity and authenticity. We’re here to be complicated, and in being so to its fullest, to recognise that the complexities point always to a still centre which can contain every contradiction there ever was in a state of balance and peace.
We cannot know this still centre until we own and embrace all the parts of ourselves we find so hard to accept. As long as we deny or ignore them we are living in a state of constant tension, with part of our psyche in permanent lock-down just in case one of them should try to escape at some inopportune moment! And we cannot know our true selves until we know all of who we are, which includes the bits we don’t like, the parts that disgust us and the aspects of our nature which don’t fit with who we perceive ourselves to be.
This weekend the cosmos speaks about these parts and urges us to open our hearts a bit wider to let them in and have their say. Whatever it may be, however heinous its message, if it’s inside us we need to hear it now and recognise that it’s there for a reason; it’s ours to work with and, if necessary, heal. But even healing may not be necessary once we let it speak, because, having heard its message we may begin to realise it has a perfectly valid role in our life if we would just let it do its thing.
Maybe our inner judge is the other face of wise discernment, or our inner tyrant is the other face of responsible leadership. It doesn’t matter what’s in there, it’s how we apply it in our lives that counts, and few things have no useful application whatsoever. Even if that application is only a better understanding of others once we can recognise our own disowned parts which cry for recognition.
This is the crux of the inner work we humans have to do. It’s deeply challenging but commensurately satisfying when we do it. And this weekend is a prime time to get stuck in and empty out the darker recesses of our psyches where all those disowned voices live. They are part of you and me and consigning them to the darkness is an act of cruelty beyond measure, like locking a distressed child in a darkened room. All it creates is greater suffering and deeper pain, and we really need to stop creating more suffering right now, as individuals and as a collective!
So this weekend is a time for the ignored, the suppressed, the denied, to find their voices within us and be allowed to speak. And as we listen we can breathe softly and deeply, stay focused and hold them within a loving space that acknowledges their words, meeting them with the recognition that they were spoken in our voice. Their words are ours. Whatever they said and however we felt as we listened, there is nothing to fear. We are merely paradoxical, contradictory and surprising, just as we are meant to be: beautifully human, wonderfully flawed and perfectly whole….all at the same time.
Enjoy your weekend everyone.
Sarah Varcas
© Sarah Varcas 2021 All Rights Reserved. Permission is granted to freely share this article in its entirety on the condition that full credit is given to the author, it is distributed freely and the URL www.astro-awakenings.co.uk is included.
Comments
Sarah, how stunningly beautiful and well articulated.
I had an experience 'happen' out of the blue the other eve and felt the opposite of 'me' I hadn't in quite some time. I am grateful to admit after working through it from the recognition of human-ness sitting with my role of bringing it to me, the re-action and energy to what happened, allowing the thoughts and feelings to bubble up to making peace and choosing where I wished to 'be'--'Wow....how far I have come'!
Thank you for your contributions to SL and 'us'. Truly a treasure you are.
Blessings
Wow...while reading this I was terribly confused.
But now that I think about it not only do I understand completely, but it also explains and confirms the reason for mine and my children's recent and sudden negative-ish attitudes.
I do not deny that my ego is trying to keep this part of me suppressed, however it's weirdly liberating.
Thank you so much, Sarah...you're amazing
WOW and double wow! I had a therapist that worked real hard on this one with me. First, I had to acknowledge the dark side, work with it and then learn to embrace it. When I could see myself in the faces of those who had murdered, I could learn to work with my anger issues in a positive way. "but for the grace of god, there go I"--this really helped me. I was sexually abused as a child, and when I could see how acting out from a place of abuse yourself, the abuse kept happening. It was up to me to stop that generational abuse. I make this sound so easy---it about killed me for many years--I do not trivalize it. Thank you Sarah for your truthfulness and honor in telling it like it is. Blessings to your "dark" side as well as "light" side.

I had an experience 'happen' out of the blue the other eve and felt the opposite of 'me' I hadn't in quite some time. I am grateful to admit after working through it from the recognition of human-ness sitting with my role of bringing it to me, the re-action and energy to what happened, allowing the thoughts and feelings to bubble up to making peace and choosing where I wished to 'be'--'Wow....how far I have come'!
Bettina, this is a wonderful description of what we can all be doing at this time. Thank you for sharing it with such clarity here
Wow...while reading this I was terribly confused.
But now that I think about it not only do I understand completely, but it also explains and confirms the reason for mine and my children's recent and sudden negative-ish attitudes.
I do not deny that my ego is trying to keep this part of me suppressed, however it's weirdly liberating.
lol Tiff
Indeed. The liberation of just being whatever we are 
Sarah, I think this is what you mean? The other day when meditating for some reason I started talking to the fear I have had all my life. I thanked it for how hard it has worked in my life, and the many things I've learned from fear. Then I told my fear that I loved it, and wanted it to come home to my heart with everyone else I have gone back and rescued, like all the different parts of my inner child.
The love I felt from my fear was breathtaking. I told my fear, that it doesn't have to work so hard anymore, as now that it's home I am more balanced, and my fear had a place. Like a filing cabinet I put it in it's right slot. I did the same with my shame. I still have others to do when they are shown to me, but I do feel more whole since bringing them both home. Is this what you're saying?
Oh my!
This really resonated with me and also made me sad that I had not acknowledged that/those part(s) of me.
consigning them to the darkness is an act of cruelty beyond measure.
This also goes hand in hand with an entry from 14th August.
it's as if my little dark and doubting thoughts pop up and I'm learning to embrace their energy as wonderful allies rather than saboteurs. It's a bit frightening at first to embrace these little 'dark' angels but when I do it's so empowering and balanced!
Then I told my fear that I loved it, and wanted it to come home to my heart...
Thank you Asager for your approach which has helped guide me to accept the yin and yang of myself.
Thanks Noel, I was driving home today, and for some reason, I started thinking about my innocense. Remember the innocense we had before the first attack, when we realised, We don't like this earth, so we put on a bit of armour to protect us, and leave behind the 1st piece of innocense. We end up with so much armour on and wonder where did our innocense go?
Well I decided to go back to that 1st time and pick up that piece of innocense and bring it home. Then I quickly went back to every piece of innocense I had dropped on the way, and even every lifetime I have lived, to get every piece of it and I brought it all home. How whole I feel. The innocense I bought home kept pouring into me for a long time. Even as I write this my soul is in joy being reunited with myself. I just thought it important to collect both sides of ourselves. Asager
I just thought it important to collect both sides of ourselves.
Thanks Asager!
I totally agree. I was reading a book about the Divine Matrix and it was saying we can go back and 'fix' situations, change the outcome...and this is reflected forward (which indicates the expression 'as above, so below' can switch to 'as below, so above').
‘Stop trying to be what we’re not and start being what we are (a great big mass of fascinating contradictions, paradoxical opposites and irrational thoughts and feelings!). We were never meant to be straightforward. We’re here to live amidst complexity and still find a way to do so with integrity and authenticity. We’re here to be complicated, and in being so to its fullest, to recognise that the complexities point always to a still centre which can contain every contradiction there ever was in a state of balance and peace.
We are merely paradoxical, contradictory and surprising, just as we are meant to be: beautifully human, wonderfully flawed and perfectly whole….all at the same time.’
I am speechless Sarah...and that rarely happens
The music and art you bring forth by weaving words together is just amazing. Thank you. 
Hello Asager
yes, that's a good description of a way to work with all our contradictions and paradoxes. And that love you felt...well...what a reward for efforts made! Being able to acknowledge and accept and then love those bits of ourselves that we often automatically pull away from is powerful work to do because it changes so much and seems to free up a lot of energy that's otherwise blocked and stale.
Hello Noel
Yes! SkyHawke's comment is spot on there: frightening but then empowering and balanced.
I love the comments you've both made on this thread. Really poignant and from the heart...
Hello Esme
I'm hoping speechless is a good thing?! lol. Love to you xx