The Illusion of Value and Self-Worth

A Quest For Emotional Dollars!

You are seeking value and self worth from your relationships and you don’t even know it. Value is an amazing phenomenon because like money value is a measurement of energy; emotional output. Little do we understand why we continue to encounter the tug-a-war experienced in our relationships. We want to feel as if we are valued and worthy of being part of any interactive experience. To desire to be valued is another limitation just as the limitations we have placed on money.

Value like money is measured on a spectrum of being a little or a lot. The more we seek to experience a calculated value of our worth to another it becomes more tiresome and challenging. It causes one to be in constant e-valuation (energy value) of the response being received from those around you especially one’s mate. One party invests much time (the investment of time = energy output) doing everything to feel value or worth and the other struggles in opposition…most often not intentionally. We have all been on both sides of the spectrum. The effect is much like two magnets repelling each other. Neither party wants to surrender. Control is about value and worth! ITS EMOTIONAL MONEY!

This is the ultimate prize derived from competition; football, basketball, chess, grades, social status, monitory status, life etc! The ultimate prize is value. We want everyone to acknowledge our worth, that’s why we want to be a “good person” (whatever that is), we want to be upstanding citizens, we want to be well liked etc. The quest for value digs deep into our emotions and it’s used to keep us at odds with each other, in school, in our corporate jobs, in our religious organizations. The hunger for value taps into our soul and we look down on others when they do not appear to possess the well defined rules of “value”. Again “value” is emotional money! So what are you saying Sonia? What I am saying is that if you could but for a moment step back and examine where you are, examine your role in any and all relationships with people are there some common threads that keep appearing. Do you find yourself in jobs where you just keep getting passed over or being continuously reprimanded, disliked, feeling inadequate or do you find yourself trying really hard and hoping to hear the words “good job” Notice the feeling that floods over you when you do hear “good job” and notice the feeling that chokes you when those words never seem to come. Not only do you want to be paid in dollars and cents you want emotional dollars as well! As I have written in the articles Energy is Free…are you, and the most recent article It’s all about your Private Reality/Universe I indicated that any quantative value given to money is still a limitation, well the same goes for any measurable value you may try to limit yourself to.

Our minds are clouded by the illusion of the game. This particular level of the game is based on all of the rules for this level of the game called “A LIMITED LIFE”.  To move beyond this level of the game you must remove the concept of measuring your worth! Your monetary condition is tied into your sought after “value”. You are technically measuring the net worth of your life force! Again everything that you do is tied into this concept and you spend your entire life proving your worth. Some give in to the pressure of proving their worth and step off the ride; literally, others die from the stress, some simply find another reality in their minds to operate and those are the people we call crazy. The rest of us intellectualize our lives so that it does not appear as if we are seeking value and worth. We are amazing masters and game players! We are so amazing at disillusioning ourselves and with that same tenacity you’ve created this matrix, this illusion within which you find yourself feeling trapped and imprisoned. That’s how good you are. You made the illusion so believable that you are having a hell of a time unconvincing yourself that it’s not real, “but it has to be... how else am I going to find value and self worth , but oh wait that’s right I exist in an endless stream of consciousness, I am creation!”  

The matrix now faces wars and the destruction of life, again all based on securing control, power over religious, political, racial and spiritual dominance. Who will own the rights to the real estate of the human mind, body and consciousness? Are you in the infinite flow or are you in pursuit of seeking value? Whatever your location on the planet it is significant to your own personal evolution as each area provides a specific vibration of minds in resonance with your needs as a spiritual being having a human experience. Souls in lands of absolute poverty and war lay under a blanket of the contracts of that land. Each land is its own matrix with its own mission, its own rules of engagement for the experiences which will be presented or experienced in that land. There might be difficulty in understanding this concept but the facts speak for themselves. This is akin to the concept of culture as I have written about as well.

Each country, each environment has its own culture by which a people will resonate collectively. There are things that are understood within other cultures which you may not so readily agree with. These are the collective tones by which they operate much of which is unspoken. These codes of culture are infused with value therefore there is pride in upholding these cultural codes. When one steps outside of these cultural codes one loses value, ones worth is lost among a people and it is with ease that cultures with ridged codes can without thought stone an adultress to death or exile one of their own. Value must be protected at all cost. Religious beliefs have value to them and in that same manner they will annihilate millions of people to secure value; the measurable worth of the collective. The value of the individual does not matter in such cases as value is received from the collective.

We find that same premise in what we would call our modernized lives. Instead we fulfill the collective value by attempting to convert others to our religion or to force ones mate into some sort of value scale or by judging others whose life might not seem to fulfill the guidelines of the status quo. Oh yes the concept of value and self worth goes much deeper than you may have thought, take a careful evaluation of your life right now, the challenges you may be facing right now in your romantic relationship as well as with those around you. Feeling as if you are being taken for granted is a big sign that you are in “value crisis” mode. You don’t have enough emotional dollars coming in! Stop being taken for granted then, just stop; no one is making you do that. You have set this experience up, this illusion hoping that perhaps you would eventually get it and then awaken from this deception and retrieve your power.

If you can manage to see this for yourself you will be amazed that when you snap out of this you will retrieve your power from every draining situation in your life right now!…why is that?  Because I can guarantee you that pretty much all of your decisions and choices are running off of the same value scale, and they are all draining your power! Once you are able to do this things will change in your relationships as you will no longer be feeding these power draining conditions any more. You will no longer need validation and worth. You will no longer need to be defined by anyone. You now see your true self as an unlimited being that is infinitely abundant. As they say change your thinking and you change your life well you can’t change your thinking until you get it! To simply memorize affirmation after affirmation is like dealing with hooked on phonics or singing the alphabet; it’s just memorized information. It is important to understand concepts and ideas by which you have built your reality in order to create something new.

Many of you are having relationship challenges. I have said many times, do not worry about whether your mate understands this information or not, simply focus on you. Believe it or not your mate is serving a purpose far greater than you might be able to see at this time but you are unable to see what this amazing teacher is presenting to you, why, because you are busy seeing all of the things you don’t like about your mate. You are distracted by that, the question then should be, why are you with him/her or they. When you are able to stop long enough to examine your position and set your ego aside for a moment you will see something beautiful and as I said once you are able to wade through the dislikes you will understand why you are in your relationship and it will set you both free. (I am not saying that the s---t won’t hit the fan when this realization surfaces)

The relationship/s will then move to the next level one way or another. In the mean time you are caught in the emotional currency game just like the rest of the planet… all playing for emotional dollars! You are reading this article for a reason, stop and recognize that reason…now what are you going to do about it! We are no doubt trapped in our own minds and only you hold the key.



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Sonia Barrett

Sonia Barrett like many has been a seeker of more expansive knowledge since childhood. Her work is an embrace of science and spirituality as one in the same. 

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